IT'S NOT ABOUT ME- Friendship

It Not About Me - Friendship
Have you ever had a friend disown you, or mad for reasons beyond what you can understand?
I have. I tend to try to not make friends with overly complicated people but occasionally I feel God call me out of my comfort box of friends to reach out to someone new, not like me, or my style or ways. I have this friend that makes ups and downs and a problem out of what I don't understand.
What have I learned from constantly finding grace in these situations? "It's not about me". This statement that is usually used as a selfish remark, is not entirely selfish at all. The trap I fall into is really a completely unselfish way that I make it about me. You see I do what I think a person who hurt someone would want to do, say sorry and seek forgiveness. Figure out what I did wrong and fix it.
But what if you didn't do anything wrong, or the person can't tell you what's wrong or the situation is more complicated then what you can understand? "It's not about you." See often God is using others to shape our life and their lives. Chances are what God is working out in them, you aren't gonna understand, cause it's not about you. God might just be using the circumstances you are in. Maybe all your job is, is to learn to forgive them for the misunderstanding and move on. Today the move on in this statement means, let her not be my friend.
I was very very saddened by this for so many years I have tried so hard to be a benefit in her life. To speak love and life in her brokenness understanding I too have brokenness. But something else broke, something that was beyond my understanding. God had to, once again, teach me, it's not about me.
I feel set free from the burden of what wrongs I could have done by excepting God is working in all of us. This is not for me to fix because it's not about me.  I know my lessons have been "live unoffened" and realizing somebody else problem with me might just be God using me as a tool to shape them. If I can be ok with that, then I can forgive their response as they work out those feelings with God, not me.
I remember having a conversation with one of my jesus friends about this; being God's means, being a useful tool. So what he is using me for, isn't always about me.
This is where the serenity prayer fits perfectly.
God grant me the serenity
to accept the things I cannot change;
courage to change the things I can;
and wisdom to know the difference.
Amen